This post has been published by me as a part of the Blog-a-Ton 6; the sixth edition of the online marathon of Bloggers; where we decide and we write. To be part of the next edition, visit and start following Blog-a-Ton.
Working for an environment company, my key areas of focus the last 8 years has been Environment Health & Safety… EHS for ya!
That’s all I do for a living… develop and implement custom made applications that help my clients record / meet their EHS goals. Applications that keep track of their Incidents, Fatalities, Near Misses, Close Calls… damn even frikkin First Aid cases!
I have lived and breathed RIR / SR / OSHA for so many years now… it’s not even funny anymore!
And every year I’ve met my self inflicted EHS goals…earning awards and kudos in my quest for a safer world!
Observation & Feedback's… am spot ON!
Safety Brown Bags… dig ‘em!
Short on a Safety Minute at meetings? have one in my back pocket… every single time!
You can count on me to bust your chops… if you aren’t sitting right at your desk… ask Colleen… my acrobatic colleague!
self imposed safety patrol...thatz me! Not just coz its drilled so deep into my brains in the last 8+ years… but also coz of the impact it has had on my work / life in the past.
(i digress… this is sounding like I am makin a pitch on my resume for an EHS coordinator job!)
Well you get the picture!
So…what stoofid thingy did I do… to land a second degree ankle twist?????
So I am out shoppin… one sunny afternoon at the mall!
It’s been a good 2 hrs since I left home… got Rave n Ryan summer clothes n sandals...
n Esha some lovely girly dresses!
While I am tryin on jeans … and am euphoric to have dropped a whole size in the Gap long-n-lean collection… the spell is broken with the phone ringin…!
(Rolling my eyes here!)
I haven’t gotten past 3 things on my check list and 2+ hrs have passed.
Damn… I better forget the jeans… it can wait! maybe I'll get thinner!!!
(am all dreamy eyed n fantazizing here!!! hihi!)
And I head down to hunt down walking shoes… for Mom.
Awwwwwwwwwwww!!!! Find a pair I LOVE… for myself! Grab them… n head back.
(Ok am actually running now…)
Get my car outta the lot… when the thot hits me… maybe they have the same sneakers in Mom’s size. They ain’t the Nike’s I wanted for her…but…what the heck…she may love them as much as I do.
So I park again…this time closer to the shoe store.
Cut thru JCPenny’s n spot the escalator…coming up.
Err! but I need to head one floor down…
The escalator goin down is round the other side of the store… damn!
Decide to take the escalator that's comin up… to go down!
I got my Grande café latté in one hand… n I am climbing down.. n down ..n down..
Damn… I don’t seem to be makin much progress here. (Duh!)
n therez a coupla kids. ..who are at the bottom...waiting for this mad person to hop off… before they board. I lose patience… n in that one brain-freeze-moment decide to jump the last coupla steps…
N I did!!!
N guess what…?
(how DARE?!)...it moved! The spot I was shootin for! Ouchi-EEE!!!!
The kids who were waiting patiently (read 'kids' n 'patient') were good enuff to ask me if I was doin ok. I hear myself sayin 'Ya.. I’ll live!' (Me puttin on a very brave front here)
I set my coffee down n wait a coupla minutes…all doubled up in pain… till I can muster up some long lost dignity... to hobble out the store.
I spot the first bench outside n crash out…when I start seein black, I start reaching for my cell phone… my first thot…is to hand my phone to the woman sittin near me… n tell her…call the number listed under home…n tell em...‘I……pppp…pas…ssss…eddd…out!’
among all the thots racing thru my pea sized brain…I start to feel my blood fast receding out my head… a numbin blackness envelops my eyes...a tingling numbness hits the back of my neck… I do remember the trick…from my low bp days…to put my head down between my knees…n start prayin…that it passes…!
It felt like ages… The whole 2 mins that passed…n I did get OK!
EEE! the blood musta’ started poolin at my sprained ankle…n it was cutting off the flow to my brain or somethin’ dramatic like that!
(More sheepish EEEE’s here!) Am I a good quack or what?!
So any sane person here…would head back home…or…maybe 'yelp for help'…rite?
Not me…!
I’m thinkin’...well if I broke soemthin… I ain’t gonna be able to do this no more…n I am here…so I mite as well…get more stuff off my list.
Go back to the shoe store…search hi n low…n don’t find the sneakers in Mom’s size (BIG time pout here!!!)
Hobble back all the way… This time am sane enuff to take the elevator to the second floor!
Get in the car…n try startin…
Ouchie Mamma! I can’t seem to push the brake to crank the engine….with my right foot!
Try to nevertheless…
N drive at a snails pace (if u know me - this is the tuffest part... drivin below 80milz is pure TORTURE!) to Sport’s Authority… limp in… the guys there…help!
One goes n finds me all the Prince rackets in the store…brings back 3 of ‘em…n confuses me more!
Why do we have SO many choices in life!!!! Hmmmphhh!!!
Gosh …my head’s spinnin again… this time with colorful rackets!!!
We match the 10 specs. I have written down in my chicken scrawl... that even I can't seem to read / comprehend in all that pain!
power level / head size / balance / length / graphite full stroke / blah blah ...
jeez! tennis rackets are way too over rated i tell ya!!!
my boy... is gonna play good ol' soccer... for sure! EEE!
I finally remember it’s the ‘Prince Triple Threat OS SCREAM-MMM’ that Shan wanted…n the guy at the store goes…’This is itttttttttt…!’ pickin up the black n yellow bumble bee like racket.
Hmmm… Looks weird! But what the heck…. That’s what Shan wanted... that’s what he gets!
Grab it…pay for it… n limp back.
Drive again at snails pace…
Half way home…figure out… ‘gee I can press the brake with my left foot too… u know’
The tricky part came when my brain forgot to tell my rite foot to get off the accel when my left was stepping on the brakes!!!
(big light bulb flashin moment here...!)
hmmm! no wonder we use the same foot…to accel’rate AND decel’rate!
EEEE!
Anyways…long drive short… got home… Safe!
Without further damage to me or other fellow motorists.
The shoes / sandals that I spent 2 hrs hunting down…fit Rave n Ryan! Ta-daaa!!!!
and do you know what my self floggings… mental spanks...about the one MAJOR regret of the day was about?
I forgot my latte... when i left Penny's! what a shame hah?!
lol!
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