passion @ crossroads

every time passion has hit...I've pursued it with..well!... passion.

passion @ 17
my earliest memory of flunking is from hi-school. I flunked a class math test. Most of my scholastic life I was an average student to say the least... education was just something I went thru 'coz all kids went to school.

who cares if there's an equal and opposite reaction to every action...huh, huh huh???

liked English much... coz it had stories... history too. loved memorizing dates those bloody wars were fought even while wondering whatz the point in learning about the past?
Geography / Physics n Chem... mildly interesting as well.
ok i digress...
back to math... so in some 12+ yrs of education I flunk a test...for the first time. n Dad decides it was time i took tuition's.
WTF! ME n tuition's? Wasn't tuition ONLY for dumb kids...???

MATH...rude awakening - part 1.
Went after it... with passion.
trigonometry...calculus..algebra... thinking in the abstract...suddenly made sense.
Fibonacci.. Pythagoras... Calculus... my new crushes.
i went after it... n A'ced the grade.

Ditto... with getting into Engineering school.
got done with college.. and inertia struck.
No goals... no motivation. Floated around some... got stoofid jobs that didn't need much brain power... only coz all my pals were working. quit each one of em in a year or less. fickle... n clueless... was i?

Marriage...passion strikes!
@ 23..i meet the man... i want to marry. Passion again. Single mindedly pursued it... against all odds n opposition... rude awakening - part 2.
stood stubbornly my ground... went thru' n got hitched.
about this time... i got a job as a developer... stuck to it. heck...even enjoyed it... must be the early love for math that helped make sense of spinning objects methods n classes in a world of geek'dom :)

CLP... passion consumes my life...again.
5 prometric exams.. in a span of 40 days... all aced on the first shot.

Switzerland...destination Uno! love at first sight.
one giant picture post card....all around.
Worked and played in paradise... for a bit.

USA... dream destination since age 20...made it at 28.
pursued it with passion.. so much of it.
first project fizzled out in 6 mnths... wasn't ready to pack my bags n head home. went after my next... with aggression. 9/11 happened n the country was rocked by its foundation. jobs were few n far in-between... esp. for an 'alien' on a work visa. got it and stuck it out... for 8 long yrs.

Kids... passionately ...wanted three in all.
took 4 yrs of waiting...to get started on the first. second came along after 3 more yrs of pursuing...n panicking about the ticking biological clock. relent came in on one condition.... only if its a he! with google aplenty and tracking the symphony for over a year passionately... made it.

now... while standing at crossroads.
inertia... passion... rude awakening...all strike the same time... at the core.
helpless, vision less and...
n its funny, could care less...this time